I have reflected over who and what we were back when we met and as newly weds, compared to how we are now... I like to think we are still the same in most ways. Neither of us have up and changed our personalities or changed our minds on our life goals. We still have a lot in common and accept each other for who they are. But at the same time, there have been some things that have changed in our relationship. We are more tolerant of each other. He now knows what not to say and when not to say it; and I now know what to say, and when to stop talking. He knows if I go to bed late, I will not want to get up in the morning. I know that when he says he wants to be there on time, what he really means is fifteen minutes early. He knows not to complain at the messiness of the kitchen when I am decorating a cake, and I know not to correct his out-of-tune singing with my own correct rendition of how it should go. I know not to ask him to repeat something more than three times, and he knows I don't understand half of what he says when I'm distracted by something.
To the passer-by, these things may not sound like dramatic life-changing lessons we have learned about each other, but to us, they have been life changing. Learning these things about the other, and applying them in our communication have made our relationship stronger. And for that, we really are better off and more in love than we were six years ago. Not because our love has changed, but because the effort we both put in to making 'us' work makes us appreciate each other more.
Seriously, I've said it before: I am constantly in awe of my husband. When I was 23 I had a conversation with a stranger who didn't know me. But I felt that he was wise, honest, and almost as though he knew something I didn't. He told me that I was going to marry the 'cream of the crop' as he put it. I laughed at the time and nodded jokingly. But despite my flippant reaction to his words, I also knew that that was what I wanted, and that was who I wanted. I wanted the cream of the crop. I didn't want to settle for anything less. I didn't know who he would be, or where I would find him; I only knew that he was out there somewhere.
And then I found him. I knew he was The One the night we both started singing the exact same song at the exact same moment while driving in the car even though there was no music playing. I then knew I was right when I heard him pray for the first time, and it was as if he was reading my heart and my mind word for word in what he said and how he said it. It was like we were the same person. He was the cream of my crop. :-)
But you know the weirdest part? The crazy thing is that I am HIS cream of the crop too! I had never imagined myself as that before.. It reminds me of that song, "Unforgettable" by Nat King Cole...
Unforgettable, that's what you are...
Unforgettable, tho near or far.
That's why darlin', it's incredible
that someone so unforgettable,
thinks that I am unforgettable too.
I love being someone's 'unforgettable', especially when I think they are the greatest person on the planet. For those who don't know Juan Antonio Montes, let me fill you in..
My husband does not talk ill about anyone. He never gossips; he doesn't even like hearing it. He serves unconditionally and without question. He reads his scriptures every day. He likes to be places fifteen minutes early because he doesn't want to be rude by walking in just before something starts. He never judges a person by their appearance. He would rather spend money on someone else rather than on himself. He is hilarious. Anyone who knows him well will agree (especially the guys). He is the humblest man I know, besides my own father; and, like my father, is the most giving of his time. He is wise. He gives me advice that is perfect for me. He understands people and appreciates their imperfections and frustrations. He knows me better than I know myself (this can actually be one of the annoying traits, too....) And anyway, I just can't go on enough about him.
Don't get me wrong. We tick each other off no end... but you know what? We can live with that. It keeps us on our toes and makes us strive to do and be better. And that's what it's all about, right?
We had a lovely anniversary and our family friend Jess watched all three of our kids for three and a half hours while we ate pizza on a cliff in the city and watched the lights below. It was the first time we had had all three kids babysat for longer than one hour, and it was such a relief and delight when we arrived home to sleeping babies and a happy babysitter! We had a great night. We walked and laughed, hugged and talked and held hands - something parents of three rarely get to do in public. We ate ice-cream and enjoyed each other's company. Oh, and did I mention he wrote me the most perfect, beautiful poem in the entire world? He read it to me after I had just woken up and it set my mood for a perfect day and evening. Unfortunately he wont let me publish it on the blog, but I plan on putting it into our blog book which I'll be getting printed soon, so if you want to have a read of it you can come by. (hehe.. don't tell him! ;-)
Six years and looking forward to the next six and beyond.
Love you babe.. xxx